apologies
Dear Mr. SUV Driver Who Honked At Me and Nearly Made Me Fall Off My Bike:
I have a few things to apologize for.
1. When you honked at me, I yelled, “What the fuck?!?” and gave you the finger as you roared past me. I actually meant to yell, “Hello to you too!” and give you a friendly wave.
2. When I caught up with you at the light, I rapped on your window and asked, “What the hell is your problem?” I actually meant to ask, “How’s your day going?”
3. When you responded with “Get that fucking thing off the road!” I called you an asshole. I meant to say, “Did I drop something? Was that why you were honking?”
4. When you suggested that I don’t pay gasoline taxes, and therefore don’t deserve to use public streets, I responded that yes, I do pay taxes. This was a lame response and I apologize. What I meant to say was that while I’m only visiting your state for the summer, I’m happy to pay all applicable local taxes on my wages and purchases. It’s unlikely that I’d want to move here with my car, though, because the drivers all seem to be big assholes.
5. I may have also suggested that while part of the cost of your gasoline does fund road construction and maintenance, an additional part ends up in the pockets of Islamic fundamentalists who use it to blow up American soldiers and citizens. This might have been over the line for polite conversation at a stoplight. I really feel bad about this, because it makes me seem like a crazed eco-hippie-peacenik, and I try really hard not to be one. I eat red meat, sir. What I should have said was, “I have additional, political, reasons for not making short, in-town trips in a car if I can help it. I’d be happy to discuss them with you over a beer.”
I feel like our interaction was somewhat less than ideal, and while I think there’s some responsibility for this on both sides, I would like to be the first to apologize.
I’ve also joined the Bicycle Alliance of Washington. They’re much better than I am at expressing how I feel, in a friendly way.
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maya said,
June 27, 2007 @ 11:29 am
Oh Editor, I feel for you. I had the reverse situation (kind of) happen a few weeks ago while I was talking to Townie on the phone while going to park my 100% biodiesel-fueled car on my street. Okay, I know a certain beloved prof would say I wasn’t exercising reasonable care, but whatever. It was late and I was all hopped up on VitaWater and I was trying to park, but when I realized I couldn’t do it properly, I stopped and just pulled over. However, a charming gentleman in my neighborhood who looked like the guy from Poltergeist decided to yell at me through my window while I was talking to Townie. He said something along the lines of “Get off your goddamn cell phone you fucking asshole!” I wanted to tell him that if he ever touched my car again I was going to beat the living shit out of him. He walked off down the street with his quart of milk yelling “Asshole!” at me. I tried to chase after him and if I would’ve caught up with him I’m sure I would’ve given him some speech about him minding his own damn business and not talking to people who had pulled over and not touching people’s vehicles. Oh well. Missed opportunities abound.
the editor said,
June 27, 2007 @ 3:49 pm
Kidding aside, I’d like to be a civil person, and I’d like to think I can respond to irritation and anger with understanding and general good-nature. What bothers me most about the incident isn’t that the guy was a jerk, it’s that I was a jerk too.
dm said,
June 27, 2007 @ 7:39 pm
it is hard to keep your cool when a someone barreling at you in a 2000-pound hunk of steel scares the bejesus out of you.
i’m amazed you had the gall to knock on his window.(and glad you didn’t get shot.)
i’m going to keep the phrase: “I have additional, political, reasons for not making short, in-town trips in a car if I can help it. I’d be happy to discuss them with you over a beer” in my mind for the similar encounters i’m sure i’ll have in michigan. I might add that i have non-political reasons for riding a bike as well.
you could have also mentioned that if he reads his state’s law books, he would find that a bicycles is a ‘vehicle’ just as much as he is, and subject to all the same laws.
also, i think it’s funny and ironic that you caught up to him at the light.
p.s. if you join the bicycle alliance of washington, do you have to have one of those awful bike outfits like the rest of them wear?
maya said,
June 28, 2007 @ 10:00 am
It’s funny, after I talked to someone about the incident that happened to me, he said I should’ve offered to take the person out for a beer to discuss his grievances against me in a rational and civil manner, rather than yelling back and attempting to chase the person down the street.
the editor said,
June 28, 2007 @ 10:16 am
The awful bicycling outfits up here are a topic for another post, I think. Maybe they are actually super-comfy, though. I should probably ride a few miles in another man’s tacky spandex jersey before I criticize.